It's been 2 1/2 weeks since our son Luke entered the world. I must admit it has been quite an adjustment. I am pretty sure I have never been this sleep deprived my entire life (no joke). Not that Luke has been getting up early, but the other two have decided to change their wake up time since Luke arrived to an awful early morning hour that I'm sure is the Lord's way of preparing me for the early morning intercession set when we hit night and day at SHOP.
This is not a blog to complain about how tough life is with three kids. Obviously with any newborn you will have challenges especially when you have 2 other children to take care of. The real reason for this blog is to talk about something that this whole experience has helped me learn; God's grace.
Through the busyness and the sleep deprivation I realize how easy it is to fall into the trap that many have fallen into, and that is using the busyness of life as a means to live Spiritually mundane. It's easy to fall into this trap because you don't even think about what you are missing because you don't have time to think about it. Before the latest addition I was able to have prayer time with the Lord before the family was awake, all of a sudden the kids are waking me up and I am getting them ready ...suddenly I lost my 45 minutes with the Lord in the morning. I went a whole week without much thought of my devotional life with the Lord.
What does this have to do with God's grace? Well after that first week the Lord decided to meet me where I was. All of a sudden I felt him moving upon my heart and it was such a WONDERFUL feeling of pain in my stomach. I was like, "ohhhh Lord, you're still there"...not only did I feel His desire toward me, I again felt strong desire for Him. At the same time vision came back to me and the desire to be before Him as a priest. He continued meeting me this way every day at different times and each time I wanted to lean further into his presence. I started finding ways in my day to meet with him by taking kids for walks and to the park slapping on the ipod and locking in, letting the cd in the van minister to me as I drive here and there. I even feel the urge and desire to start songwriting again (hopefully you will have some more songs to download in the coming weeks)
These things won't replace time spent with the Lord in my prayer room in the mornings, but they are sure helping me in the mean time as we make the transition. I've come to discover more than I ever had, the Lord's grace and how he desires to have communion with me. Grace to pull me in and help me remember that the man living inside of me needs to me my life giving source and that there is soo much more for those that will not settle for a mundane Spiritual life.
